Friday, July 04, 2008

Out of guts...

Once I thought that I'm one of those that is very courageous no matter in what aspects of life... go all the way for what I want or go all the way just to live the way I want... Why is it so as I don't wanna leave any regrets meaning I don't wanna keep regretting my choices in life thinking of the past.
However lately there's just too many things that I keep on delaying as I fear of making the wrong choice (decision) which will leave me regretting or more likely fear I'll lost terribly with my choices.... Errgghhh !!! I'm so frustrated with myself :( Does growing older ( ok I admit I'm getting old here hahaha ) makes me losing my grip and feeling as though most of the things are in uncertainty???
At times even telling the whole truth seems to cook up lots of guts to just spit it out to others, like afraid they'll get offended and hurt which makes me think twice even in some conversation ( haha at times even thinking thrice ) Now I'm missing the younger me... if truly growing makes me lost my guts I truly just wanna stay young but its never possible ... ' Time is god and speed is devil' ... Maybe I'll just have to admit I'm old and out of guts now :(